That Name Is Money

 It has always been my pleasure in life to give to charity. So in keeping with my charitable nature, I would like to help out single moms out there in choosing the appropriate name to rack in the big bucks on the good old stripper pole.

• Serendipity - It worked in Dogma for Selma Hayak. And a name that says good luck might be just what is needed.
• Felicity - It’s happy. It’s snappy. Pure perfection.
• Mercedes - It stands for sleek, fast, with smooth lines and curves. It just doesn’t get much better than that.
• Summer - It’s hot. It’s sweaty. It’s gotta work.
• Destiny - Leaves men hoping that it could be their destiny.
• Diamond - It’s shiny and it’s a girls best friend.
• Candy - Candy is dandy but well you know the rest.
• Savannah - With a soft sultry southern drawl, it just might be the ticket to your own personal Tara.
• Tiffany - Makes you think high end. And what could be better than that.
• Champagne - Light, bubbly, and intoxicating.

On the flip side here are a few names to avoid like the plague when choosing your stripping name.

• Maude - Only in ‘Airheads’ would anyone want to see a naked Bea Arthur.
• Ethel - The thought of a naked Ethel Merman screeching ‘There’s No Business Like Show Business’ sends chills down my spine.
• Frau Blucher - She even makes horses cry.
• Mom - While everyone loves their mom, only really sick freaks want to see her naked.
• Marge - It’s just to close to large and in charge to work.

If this helps just one single mother then my job here is done. Now I will sit back and bask in the good vibes that doing well for others always brings.